一个人吃饭是什么感觉

如果你问我一个人吃饭是什么感觉？

我的答案是：“没感觉，只想饱肚子！”

一星期七天，我几乎都是一个人吃晚饭，已经没感觉可言！

友人告诉我如果要他一个人吃饭，他会选择不吃！

工作完了，精力也玩了！我不能不吃！

我都会选择最角落，最不起眼的位子！

一个人尽快把晚饭吃完，叼头就走！

今晚，一如往常我一个人吃饭，店里满座，我的位子没了！

老板热心招待，硬要我留下吃饭！

眼前只有大门口的大圆桌，我一个人坐下八人坐的位子！

紧紧身体靠着角落的墙壁！

一整顿饭，我不乘抬头，一直望下...

经过的顾客不时望向我！

今晚的饭很难吃！

好的哭

今天大家一起哭是为了互相鼓励，互相挟持，一起走下去！明天会好一些，开心一些！值得的！

累

今天的我很累，很累！很伤心！

我的第十年

我的生日快到了，我二十九了！也是我离开家里的第十年，一个人在外的第十年！想想这十年里，书也读完了，工作一如往常！这十年我做了什么，做的好吗？我问我自己，顿了自己... 刚刚和友人谈起自己，无法定性的自己，是不是因为自己没有一个家！我说：‘是’！我很想要一个家，我的家，做我喜欢的，白白的，很随性的摆饰，有人陪我吃饭，哭的时候我人陪！我的家，你在哪？没答案！只好继续走走走....我清楚我想要的一切，我的家，也是我的梦想！目前的我仍然处在黑暗里，努力着，向前看，期待我的家，我的，我的....

讽刺的自己

回家的路上，眼前的月亮模糊不堪，脑里出现了一幕很凄凉的画面！一路思考的好多，觉我自己很讽刺！明明累了，状况很糟，很想趟在床上闭着眼到天亮！我却坐在电脑前思考，硬要自己快乐起来！很讽刺！

冷静.....冷静.....冷静.....

my dream

i am getting myself to the limit to grab all into my hand, please pray for me. It is a long journey, i wish i can do it one by one! 

lim+goh=limjingtyan

These are my lingo (lim+goh), my papa and my mama. Papa lim chow nee (70 years old), Mama goh lian chwee (63 years old) . They love singing, they always pratice at home before they have any singing performance. My papa like to record his singing with mama. He played the cassete in his car everyday. Every night, before he sleep he will play his singing cassete again. When my papa was young he likes to join choir very much. At the end, he give up because he got to work day and night. Now he has retire, he decided to form his own choir team. He did it, he is the leader now . He provide venue, vehicle and food. Every tue and sun, is his choir pratice. He likes to cook 'dong shui' and kuih muih for his member. He willing to do this, this is his hobby after his retiring life.

Every morning, my mama goes dancing with a group of friend. They have to wear red T-shirt as their uniform. From far you are see a group of people in red very clear and outstanding. After dancing, they will having breakfest together. Sometimes my mama will cook some dishes and bring over to share with her friends. They are forever happy and noise. My mama's car always prepare small chair for her to chit chat after dancing.

Both of them are very enjoy their life. They are forever active in social life. I am so proud of my papa and mama. Please do take care and love yourself ya. Love you, your daughter amei.

my mum cook

my mum is a good cook, she used to cook since she is 1o years old...she born in a poor family, she is no.2 among 10 sisters and brothers.she trained to cook for her little brothers and sisters. Every morning she has to cook before she went to work. According to my mum, she had to prepare plenty of porridge and simple vege. These are their breakfest and lunch (2 in 1). when the time my mum was in 17 years old, she worked as a maid in penang. This is the first time she left home and worked alone in Penang. ( maybe this is the reason she likes to eat penang asam laksa) when she was in penang, she used to cook different type of cuisine....chinese food, western food etc...she is a talented cook. I still remember when i was 11 years old....i used to watched my mum cook....and she always asking me to go out of the kitchen. she don't like anyone of us to kacau her .....haha but i still stand next to her. One day i told my mum, can i cook for you. " You sure or not", " I said i can". At the end, i cooked 4 dishes and 1 soup. It is really a surprise to my family, but my mum keep saying can eat or not.....while she was talking,her mouth is full of food. kekeke.....

yesterday night she cook a fantastic ' char siow'. Omgs...it is damn happenning, it's taste good and yummy.... i love it. woooohhhhhhhhhhhh.... Look at the 'char siow' , it is so fat and oily but when you put it in your mouth. You difently shock of it.....thanks mum! good job, well done! i love it! you forever my idol in everythings you are.

#ps: peppies, my mum is going to cook for you guys....she is preparing for everyone of you, i will bring back for our lunch meal. dun miss it ok , i will be back this 4 May (mon). C ya!

mine watches!!

1 2 3 4 5 6  

1 from different places,

2 from different peoples

3 contains different weight

4 built in different length

5 from different background

6 in different prices

but

they all belong to me

they all my favorite

they are mine

i love it

watches are my favorite

for myself

tiring makes me feel sad, feel down, feel lost

tonight i have decided to treat myself a good meal

i went to zen which my favorite japanese restaurant

i am here alone but i still feel warm

because i have tasted a warm and familiar taste 

which i have been forgotten in my memory

last time when pep still at sunway

i used to go zen quite often

hoi is the one who always accompany  me

her favorite fresh raw sanman 

but now we are getting lesser and lesser

and she is not around with me almost 4 month

as usual i have my regular set meal 'sanman salt'

zen- forever the best cook for this meal

i still love you very much

i ate very full and peace

i spend an hour just enjoying my meal

ya, it defiantly not cheap

but i think i have to treat myself 

because i need it

i need to recharge my battery

i need to recover slowly

i need too . . . 

i wish too . . .

i want to be . . .

设计师

还记的小学一年级，我的志愿 . . .

写了‘设计师’，当时也搞不清楚什么？

就这样‘它’一直跟随着我 . . .

到了中学毕业侯，我依然选择了‘设计师’

尽管和家人争吵，被亲朋契友泼冷水

我还是坚持的要‘它’

选择了‘它’

一个人到陌生的地方生活

还记得离开家的那一天，妈妈并没有送我

我知道她舍不得

就这样我一个人来到了这里生活

一个人吃饭， 一个人看电视

一个人， 一个人！

每逢星期日从家里回到这里

我会哭个不停！

又是一个人的我 . . .

我不喜欢这里的星期日

在这里生活的第三年

我的毕业试来临

六月的某一天，我想放弃‘它’

我无法完成‘它’

也不敢向家人诉苦，说我不行了！

因为我选择了这一个‘它’

我只好坚持

最终我也成了‘它’

学院毕业侯，就工作了将近七年

这七年里，我不停的工作

因为我很自豪，我是‘它’

工作狂， 工作痴

也记不得我所做过的什么什么

也不曾记得它！

我喜欢‘它’的过程多过‘它’的样貌

工作上却偏偏唱反调

我也尝试了好几年

尽管市场的要求也日夜更新

究竟我还能适应多少呢？

不知道！

我选择了这样的一个‘它’

对还是不对？

空白格

回家的路上，脑里一片空白格

空白着白天黑夜的过活

坐在车子上，心灵一片空白格

空白着无音乐的陪伴 . . .

意外的发生 ，体力一片空白格

空白着如何继续撑着 . . .

走进房间里，眼里一片空白格

空白着如何整理它 . . .

坐在电视前，心里一片空白格

空白着戏里的故事 . . . 

听了妈妈的电话，思绪一片空白格

空白着你的健康 . . .

顿了几分钟，还是一片空白格

空白着一切一切 . . . 

可以

今早我起的很早

因为只有在这个时侯

不用刷牙

不用打扮（或许我从不）

不用说话

可以懒懒的

可以丑丑的

可以暖暖的

可以空空的

可以静静的

可以轻轻的

享受早上的温暖

让我觉的很平静！

悲与喜

今晚我们在汕城用餐，一如往常，我又多点了一个人份。当aunty把‘星洲米粉’摆在中间时，我就很好奇地说：‘你怎么知道这是公私吃的！’ aunty 笑笑说她知道！当时，我的眼泪差一点就掉了下来！我怎么会这样能？就因为那一个‘星洲米粉’吗？不是的，而是我的眼泪挺不住了！近来，发生了好几件事，一连二三地发生... 车的问题，脚的问题，精神的问题，钱的问题，等等？？？？不记得我躲在厕所哭了几次？疯了几次？我的脚又痛了，令我坐得很不舒服，很想再去‘军师’，它的痛令我全身发抖，麻痹！回家的路上，痛的很！原来它会是那么漫长的一个旅程！车的问题令我烦大了头，刚刚我又发现了一些事，又得再去再去再去好几趟produa. sighs.......因为你，我的精神出了毛病，很怕下雨，每当下雨天，不论是白天或黑夜，我都担心着，吓醒着！慢慢地也开始疑神疑鬼了！没有音乐的陪伴，令我觉的很空荡荡的，很恐惧！有些事我想我还是不能接受，却点头说‘好’，‘可以’！

放工前，老板给大伙们讲了一些话！听了后，我恍然被她打醒了，脑里想了一些些想法，想通了某些事！谢谢你！也和大伙人谈了好一阵子，收获不少！谢谢你们！顿时，我的心热了起来！我想我应该把它放下，都发生了，不能回头！我应该把手上的事情做好！我想要安慰！今晚我吃了好饱好饱，我知道我须要力量来作战！我要睡的好，我要好好的！因为我还有好多好多的事等着做！

我想我会没事的，有什么做错的，讲错的！请原谅！

我接受的！

耳朵里的小小听筒！

虽然我们就只有两只耳朵

可是我们却天天收听着不同的电台

听一听轰叫的

听一听温柔的

听一听争吵的

听一听你的

听一听他的

听一听它的

听一听我自己的

一二三四五六七

一听就数不清

听不清你我他它的声

究竟应该是my fm / 988 / mix fm / hits fm / light & easy / 933...

太多喽！

不知道啦！

等等

好不好？

我只想听一听

听我自己世界里的声音

只须要一个就好

一个让我沉默， 让我低头，让我平静， 

让我哭， 让我笑，让我疯， 让我喊，让我巅

让我让我让我让我

让我...世界只有你而已

让我...我只须要你而已

让我...我不能没有你

只要让我沉默， 让我低头，让我平静，

 让我哭， 让我笑， 让我疯， 让我喊， 让我巅

我就能抬起头，向前看着你， 听着你， 说着你！

不得不佩服耳朵里的小小听筒！

你的耐心， 你的结构！

等

三月三十日早上七点整，买了早点

坐在巴士上，闭上眼

心急着把早点带回去

开开心心的

分享我爱吃的

到了家，

坐上车，急着上班

因为我迟到了

转了一转

耳边传来一阵阵的水声

停在一旁，眼呆呆的往着它

不是吧！又来！

打了电话，赶紧求救

一路上，只能慢慢的

水不断涌着我

怎么办！

到了修车厂

赶紧报告我的遭遇

他说他的

我说我的

最终的答案：“等”

我很担心我的影响系统，

一直希望对方可以帮帮我

答案还是等

觉的好无助

身边都是我须要的

却只能坐着等

我无法忍受

只好用报子慢慢地把水吸走

过了半小时

JJX 2103

开了车门

"banyak air nya"

就叫我再等一等

来了另一位修车员

看了一看

就说这很麻烦的，要做就很贵

那没办法

只好点点头，签了名

把车交给他

到了公司

也忘了早点的事

今天很忙

喘不过气

快要下班了，才想到我的早点

急忙叫大伙们吃了它

叮烧后，咬了一口

味道不一样了

样子也不一样了

怎么了

我的这一天！

为什么？

外面的雨好大好大！

我的心好冷好冷！

想要大大声喊， 大大声哭！

却喊不出声， 哭不出声！

眼泪一直往内流，羡慕你哗啦啦的下个不停！

真的很累！

真的很痛！

白， 对不起！

答应过你会找出答案，

却伤了你一次有一次！

我真的无能为力！

为什么？

为什么？

不停在我脑海里浮现

我真的不知道

别再问了？

为什么？

me and my diana!

big sunny day, hot shinny light
bringing my toy tour around Muar town
is a nice weather to use this DIANA...
its need big strong light
it had with me 2 years plus
this is my first time using it















under 36-40 temperature
is really hot
i'm so wet
i'm so smelly
but the view is so attractive
i'm still happy i'm here
no comment

hows the result?
i dunno
it is a mystery
it might turn out a piece of nice photo
or a black empty photo

hmmm....
is interesting to make you guess??
so do i ?















it is so different compair with digital camera
it is a toy of imagery.
no preview! no sound! no regret! no excuses!
once you drag the button
the imagery is build
build in a grey area....
until it come to the world
answer announce
happy or not
is the result!

i hope i can get 50 over 100
please....

am i ask too much
@@)

my day

yesterday night, i had a nice movie at 1U, watched yasmin ahmad latest movie "Talentime". Its so beauty, that i feel it until now and tomorrow.

slept around 3am and wake up 7.45am this morning, catched my bus back to muar. As usual have "chu cheong fun" as breakfest at petaling street. Leave pudu at 10.15am, arrived muar at 12.30pm. Papa pick me from bus station, in our journey back , we only have few word among me and papa. Going to have my lunch, notice my motorcycle petro is empty, air of tire is nearly gone. Omgs, it happened again! sighs! Reach bakery shop, asking my mama for the lunch, is a busy day for "ching ming". They have "tapao" for their lunch. So, i decide to look for my friend karen.... we went out to eat at "tam ciak kuih". eat "wanton mee, otak-otak, satay... today this street is full of people...so hot so crowded....luckly food still nice. Visit CIMB, finanly i got to draw out money, which i can't draw out yesterday.

After finish dinner at home, around 7.45pm. I'm preparing for the earth hour event, informing my family that i'm going to shut off all the electricity. Kiddos are excited but the old and mature 1 are not really agree, they want to do this and that! End up the lights are all closed but the TV is still on. Because astro AEC is doing singing competition! Papa favorite! This is my earth hours for tonight, no candle but got TV.

After 9.30pm, lights turn on! Is not easy to educate this message to my family. But it is hard to happened together, because my family contain too many people. They have different needs and opinion! I had done my part, finished my responsibility! Finished my bath, going "lim tea" with friends until 2am. Reaching home, open the ladtop.....starting my blog and visiting FB.

This is my day , is really tired and sick.

i just want to recall back, what have i done today. Sorry for it!

seat in everywhere

this is my seat

i have to sit tight 8 hours per day

but tonight when i was talking with mojo

i found out sitting in different places, create different feel and view

likes:

reception : nice view which i never been before, 

quite a fresh mind, but is really cold here....

conference room: i like to sit here, is comfort and relax :)

when strangers are sitting in (meeting), no more comfort and relax :(

our new seat: for mojo:"welcome to our land"

starting your design world!

hoi's place: i miss you very much, waiting you!

loo's place: transformer lover!

every morning must have a cup of green color NESCAFE 3 IN 1!

every time i sit on your chair, i feel so short, cos you are too tall!

phenie's place: the blue mug is so important to her, 

she can't live without water...or maybe her favorite MILO!

and her HP always ONZ fm 98.8

bobo's place: this is the only seat with colorful view

the feng-shui plant must always fill in water

is important for him to get inspiration and HUAT!

he will make noise if the water is gone, " oh no! oh no!, how... how....

pantry: my favorite place to sit, eat, drink, chit chat, working etc....

it is so warm, nice view, nice lighting, nice food & drinks

this is my second working place, i use to sit here sometimes....

reading and enjoying a cup of PU ER, TIE GUAN YIN......

conclusion: i like to sit everywhere

but still prefer my seat, it is mine!